Co-Review: Gay the Pray Away by Natalie Naudus

We’re big audiobook listeners over here at BookCrushin, and when we saw that beloved narrator Natalie Naudus was releasing her own novel, and narrating it herself, we hit play immediately. Gay the Pray Away is raw, funny, furious, and full of heart: a deeply personal story about queerness, faith, family, and the long, complicated road to self-acceptance. We knew this one would spark a lot of feelings, so we’re doing something special: a co-review to unpack it all. From first impressions to favorite chapters to how Natalie’s voice brought the entire experience to life…here’s everything we felt while listening.

Gay the Pray Away

by Natalie Naudus
Narrator: Natalie Naudus
Published by: Quirk Books
on June 4, 2024
Genres: Contemporary, LGBTQIA+, Young Adult
Bookshop, Audiobook through LibroFM
Goodreads

Valerie Danners is in a cult. She just doesn’t know it yet. When she finds a queer book at the library and smuggles it home, her conservative Christian homeschooling world begins to crack. And when the cutest girl she’s ever met shows up to Bible class, she starts to question everything.

Riley is so confident and kind, and she and Valerie bond quickly over existing as multiracial teens in a very white Christian community. As Valerie explores her feelings for Riley, she begins to see that the world she knows is a carefully crafted narrative.

Publicly, the girls are close friends—holding hands in prayer, rooming together at a conference. Privately, they grasp at any chance to continue their forbidden romance—until they are found out. Now Valerie must choose between staying with a family she fears will never accept her, or running away with the girl she loves.

Review

First Impressions:

Christy:
I can’t remember where I first saw Gay the Pray Away but I do remember my first reaction: wow, I had no idea Natalie grew up in the same cult as me. And at the time I was grappling with my sexuality and undoing comphet. To say this book hit all of my feelings at the right moment is an understatement.

Kelly:
I really was drawn to the fact that one of my favorite narrators wrote a YA book, that was loosely based on her own experiences, and it did not disappoint.

The Audiobook Experience:

Christy:
I can only imagine what it felt like to narrate this deeply personal story. Every romance and YA reader is likely familiar with Natalie’s voice and to hear her narrate her own words…about an experience we both shared (separately, of course, but the beats are the same)…

Kelly:
The thing that makes Natalie an amazing narrator, is that you can feel the story through her words and emotions, and that is the same this time, even though it is her own words, maybe she even emoted more than other times, getting to put her words and voice on this story makes it even more special. Also I loved that Natalie called out her own narration of other queer books as a joke in these pages. So adorable and self-deprecating. It is also so cool to know that narrating queer books helped Natalie understand her own sexuality, which parallels, Valerie’s experiences when she reads queer books for the first time.

The Writing & Storytelling:

Christy:
Natalie did an amazing job showcasing how easy it is for religious cults to prey on people. My family didn’t start religious, but my mother married into it and suddenly you’re dropped into something with all of these rules. And if you don’t obey? Eternal damnation, social ostracization, and yeah, you’re probably going to get beat. I’ve read a lot of YA cult books but this is the first one I’ve read set in the one I grew up in. This was as much the exploration of the patriarchy and contradiction of the quiverful movement being directed by an unmarried man who preyed on young women, as it was learning about your queerness within this structure.

Kelly:
Knowing how close to home this story was for the author/narrator, I was really swept up in her emotions that she laid bare in this novelization of how she wanted to tell her story of being in a religious cult, especially for someone who wasn’t born into the fold but a family who choose to become a part of a religious movement that takes away a woman’s rights. So for a teenager who is coming to terms with their own self awareness and living among the normal folks in a normal community, Valerie knows deep down that something isn’t right with the word of the “church” and how they treat woman and gay folks. As someone who knew nothing about religious cults growing up, and still eschewed the faith I was brought up in, this book really helps people through some religious trauma, and knowing that real faith wouldn’t hurt others just because of who they are!

Themes & Takeaways:

Christy:
Nostalgic is the wrong word here because I definitely do not want to relive those times. I spent a lot of last spring and summer actively undoing a lot of the harm from this time in my life. It was nice to be seen and to have Natalie’s humor lighten the parts that got heavy.

Kelly:
I really did feel for Valerie reading this novel, as it points out to how important reading and understanding how other people are seen in the world through representation in media. Valerie wasn’t allowed to read queer books, but a very knowing librarian helped her find the books that were safe and the author also uses humor and kindness to help pave the way forward. I wish this was a memoir, it might not be for Natalie, but maybe this is the way for some queer teens who are stuck in a religious stranglehold, and I hope that books and representation help them escape.

Final Thoughts & Rating:

Christy:
There’s a whole community on reddit dedicated to snarking on people in fundamentalist cults…those folks would love this book. They’re my people for sure. And for the people who loved Shiny Happy People. Want to see what teens in this cult experienced in the late 90s and early 2000s? We got you.

Kelly:
The book was not what some would say groundbreaking, but it is so important that this kind of story be told. I found Natalie’s literary voice in this one so strong, and knowing one of my favorite audiobook narrators finds herself and uses her own words and literally her own voice to share this story was really impactful. This YA book was easy to read, and I hope it could find some teens who really need it, like Valerie did with her library books!

*Kelly received a gifted copy of the newly printed book from Quirk Books, but this does not impact her views expressed here.